I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
