So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
