STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
