walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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