One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
