Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
