if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
