how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
i need some magic done to my vagina
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize