Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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