NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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