I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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