she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
