So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I bet he comes in French.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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