He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Just pee around me
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
