Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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