He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize