need another drink. this is the easiest way
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
