dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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