bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
