next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
