maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
