Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
