"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
