Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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