I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize