I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
