mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
