I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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