Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
