I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
