everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize