She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
