I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
