i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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