so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
