He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Randomize
