He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
