I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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