so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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