There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
