Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
