I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize