I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
