I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
