its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He did a backflip because drugs
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