hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Randomize
