If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Randomize
