honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
