and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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