When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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